Just Jeri

Last night I wanted Good Seasons Italian Dressing on my salad. Kendyl likes to make it so I called her into the kitchen to make it. I sat waiting patiently at the counter for her to finish. I watched her shaking all the ingredients and I asked her if she had added the water. This is how the conversation went after that…

 
Kendyl ~ “Yes Mom…I added ALLLLL the continents. The vinegar goes to this line, the water goes to this line, then you add the package, and then the oil.”

Me (bursting out laughing) - “HA HA HA, OK…well then, here salad (as I’m pouring on the dressing), here is some Africa, some North America, Some Asia… mmmmm!”

Karsen who was also sitting at the counter burst out laughing immediately… ”BAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!”

Kendyl was a little disgruntled after the laughter but I then told her it’s conDiMents..not conTiNents!  Yes, kids do say the  darndest things!!!!!

Yes! Jenny and Jessie are pregnant! I’m soooo excited! A grandma…twice over! EEEK!   This is just a funny little story about Jessie. 

The other day Jenny sent me a Mothers Day package.  In it was something for me..and something she got for Jessie.  I drove to Jessie’s work to give it to her.  She came outside and met me and we stood by her truck and I told her to open it, that it was from Jenny.  Karsen was with me too.  Jessie opens the box and right on the top is a card that says Happy Mother’s Day!  Jessie looked at it and said..”Oh, mom..this must be for you.”  “I said..no it’s for you.”  With a definite perplexed look on her face she said..”It’s a Mother’s day card.”  Karsen and I both started laughing immediately.  I said… “JESSIE..You are a mother now too!!!!”  She was so shocked she burst out laughing and said..”oh..yeah!!!!”  hahaha  Then she said..”I’m so dumb!!!”  HAHAHA!  I laughed my ass off!!   I told her she better get used to it..cuz the “mother” isn’t going away anytime soon!!

Today, while all of us were hanging out in the kitchen (Karsen, Karlynn, Billy, and I) after dinner, I had mentioned to Karsen that the canteloupe she has been waiting for to ripen was finally ready.  Billy…was in another one of his weird moods.  I call them this because he says really weird things…ALL THE TIME!  This conversation started out like this:

Billy - Is this a honeydew? 

Me - Don’t you know the difference between a honeydew and a canteloupe?

Billy - Is this the green one?

Me - No…this is a canteloupe. 

Billy - Well, I can’t tell the difference, they both taste exactly the same.

Karsen - It does not!! They are totally different! How can you say that?

Me - They do taste different.

Billy - Why does the skin look like that? Why is it all looking like a brain and all?

Me - Ummm…how am I supposed to know the answer to that?

Billy - Well, why does it look like that?

Me - Billy!!  How the heck would I know? Why is it orange inside? Why does it have seeds? Why do you ask dumb questions that I don’t know because the canteloupe doesn’t talk to me? Why?!

Billy - I just want to know why it looks like a brain.

Karlynn {snickering up a storm}

Karsen - Billy…it just does..cuz that’s the way it grows!!!

Billy - You just don’t know the answer and that’s why you are mad.

Me - Ok, Billy…because somewhere in the world a canteloupe has told someone why it looks like a brain.  It just wasn’t me it told!

Karlynn- {giggling..a LOT}

Yep..these are the conversations of my life…..

Today before school Billy and I were sitting watching the news. They were showing a video from a robbery at a convenience store that another man had stepped in and prevented. The guy that was robbing the place was at the counter with a gun in the clerks face and the other man came up behind him and cracked a bottle over his head. This man was up there in years..I would say in his 70’s and the would be robber was in his 20’s or 30’s. The robber turned around and tried to attack the man and was clearly dazed. He swung at the man and knocked him down pointing the gun at him and finally ran out of the store without what he had come for. The other man  stood up and the video ended. I said “Wow, that man was brave..and LUCKY!” My son said, nonchalantly…”There were no bullets in that gun.” I looked at him confused and said “Why would you say something like that? How do you know there were no bullets in that gun?!” Billy said..”Because he didn’t shoot him!” I said ..”You have no idea if there were bullets in that gun. The guy just got hit over the head with a huge bottle. He was clearly dazed, AND maybe he didn’t want to shoot anyone. He just wanted money. He probably wasn’t expecting to shoot anyone!” He just shrugged his shoulders.

I thought it was weird that he just stated there were no bullets in the gun. Does that mean something? I don’t know. I know one thing..I sure as hell don’t want him to think when someone has a gun that there may or may NOT be bullets in the gun!!!

Have you ever lost something and you have absolutely no idea where? Or how? Well, I lost something and it’s been bothering me for years! I found it once about ten years ago but then I couldn’t find it again. It is so damn annoying when you look everywhere and you just can’t find it. Seriously I have gone through closets..drawers…everywhere.

Well, yesterday I found it again! OMG!! I was so happy I was jumping up and down for joy!! I told Brian..LOOOK!!!!! LOOK WHAT I FOUND!!! He just busted up laughing. I didn’t think it was funny..I was absolutely elated!

Want to know what it was that I found? It was my……WAIST! I found my waist. It has been hiding for years!! Granted it is still a bit large but I COULD SEE IT!! I saw the curves!! WOW! THAT is exciting my friends!! Yes, finding my waist made for a very good day indeed!

I bought an exercise dvd for the Wii. It is called EA Sports Active. It has all kinds of programs. Some are for target areas, some for actual whole body workouts. I’m telling you it is a real butt kicker! I have done it ONCE. I am going to restart again tomorrow. This “game” if you want to call it that, has the options of a personal trainer too. I chose the 30 day workout challenge. You have a personal trainer talking you through all the exercises. It’s awesome! It incorporates little mini games in there too. I had to inline skate..ha-ha! That was funny! It also has a little track that you run around on. It is perfect for me. I live in po-dunk and I can’t join a fitness center without having to drive 35 miles to get to it.

My point is if you want to work out at home and don’t mind forking out the 60.00 bucks (you can get it on sale for less. I saw it for 47.00 at Target), this is an awesome work out. This kicked my butt and I was so sore from the lunges that I could not hardly walk, sit (even to PEE) for about three days!! Hence, the reason why I have not done it again. LOL! Hopefully, I won’t be as sore tomorrow after doing it. Damn it! I’m so out of shape!!